My first Pod Pal auction has ended with Otto Bismarck as the winner!

Wow. Seriously, WOW. I’m completely floored by the response. Mind is officially blown and broken. When I started talking about making Pod Pals and did the beta Sakaane I didn’t really expect that other players would think it was that much of a cool idea. Grown men and women, hardcore EVE players, getting excited about a doll? Nah. Not exactly on the same level as commissioning an alliance logo, a painted portrait, a corp video, or a Guristas toque, eh? At best, maybe it’d be a curiosity that people would smile at and say “that’s neat” and then change the subject, and I’d become that weird crocheting gamer.

Still, nothing ventured, nothing gained… I was going to make one for myself either way, and if nobody ever expressed interest in wanting one for themselves, well, that would have been disappointing but not the end of the world.

I’m actually quite shy. Putting myself ‘out there’ isn’t in my nature. I constantly deal with anxiety and other unfortunate feelings. In some ways, playing EVE has helped me get better at handling that part of myself, while in other ways it’s made it way more difficult. Deciding to throw my hat in the same ring occupied by very highly visible and respected players who offer incredibly excellent, high-quality commissions in a variety of mediums caused a lot of debate in my head over whether I should try it in the first place or if I was just kidding myself by aspiring to it. After Mynxee took her Pod Pal to EVE Vegas and I received all the very positive and encouraging comments thanks to the photos she posted, I did feel much more confident that offering Pod Pals to the playerbase would be an okay thing to do. Reactions to Pod Pal Darius reinforced the decision. CCP Logibro saying he wants one was seriously an OMG moment.

Despite all of that, when I posted the auction a week ago, a grain of fear settled in my gut that whispered, What if no one bids? Self-doubt is incredibly difficult to live with. No matter what, it’s constantly there and it seeps into every aspect of everything I do and it’s stubborn as hell to get rid of. Did those people actually mean what they said or were they just saying it to be polite? What if no one bids?

Then the likes and retweets started to come in. Then the first bid arrived (thanks Mark!), then more likes and retweets, then the next bid… I posted Pod Pal Rixx and my Twitter feed started to explode. I walked around in an amazed, stunned state. Holy shit, guys. What I was seeing was nothing at all like what I expected, really. More bids. More likes, more retweets. More well wishes and encouragement. Saturday I wandered around whispering “oh my god” to myself and was thankful I had just parked the car when even more bids came in, because if my phone had flashed those messages while I was driving I probably would have gone off the road.

Not thinking I needed a sniper rule? Totally my bad. I didn’t in a million years think the interest would be this high. Lesson learned. I will include one next time!

To everyone I want to say, thank you so much. Whether you submitted bids, signal boosted the auction with retweets and quotes, tapped the like button, commented—everything! I am amazed, stunned, humbled and more than a little emotional over how well this has been received. That grain of fear was called as primary and has been properly annihilated. Thank you!

Now I have a Pod Pal to make. :)